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Though I’ve had my doubts through the years, the one thing that assures me I’m female, is my love of listening to gossip. It must be the storyteller in me appreciating the creativity of the teenage female mind, given a few key stimuli.
If you knew me, you’d know that I like to know things. I collect knowledge like stamps. A friend starts reading a new book, I will google everything there is to know about that book. Wait no, I’m far too lazy for that, I will ask them everything about that book, and retain the information like Rain Man. I’m the same with people. But like I said, I’m far to lazy to actually go ask the person these things. So I rely on gossip. That’s not to say I believe everything I hear, that’d be like referencing Wikipedia as a secondary source in my ancient history essay, but it gives me a good base to start on.
I do have one problem with my lust for gossip, no one ever tells me anything. But I suppose when you voluntarily isolate yourself from humans, there’s gotta be some draw backs. But I do have an excellent capacity to sit quietly and listen. For example, at school, I sit with a group of girls at lunch time on a semi regular basis. Over a few sporadic lunch times of me sitting quietly near them reading my comic, I discovered that a girl I considered not much more then a blip on my radar and therefore assumed she wasn’t much more to everyone else, was actually quite a despised individual. Another day in art class I pretended to be lost in thought, listening to my ipod, but I was actually listening to a student and the teacher discuss the breakdown of the student’s friendship group. It’s interesting what you hear when people think you aren’t listening.
I often wonder if people gossip about me. Unfortunately I’m relatively harmless. At the beginning of last year I tried my best to start rumors about myself of my own devising, but they didn’t take off very well. One girl did approach me and ask if I really did try to burn down my old school, but that was the last I heard of it. As you can see, I’m not particularly pro at starting rumors. I needed to start with something smaller and allow natural momentum to build it up to something fantastic.
So, there you have it. My cover is blown. I know everything. No longer shall you feel safe to whisper around me. But do not fret, if anything I do have one trait that can balance my savage hunger for knowledge, and that’s my ability to keep a secret.
But just remember, I’ll know what you have done and I’ll never forget.